Child Abuse why the Secret?

The purpose of this blog is to explore the different types of child abuse that exist and how that trauma manifests itself through adulthood.

Child abuse leads to trauma. Trauma leads to making wrong decisions and choices. Making wrong decisions and choices can waste a life.

I have come to understand that human beings are far more sensitive and vulnerable to trauma then we have come to expect. This especially applies to people that have been traumatized as children.

I think one possible reason for this is that children know only one world. That world is the world exclusively created my their family unit. And whether this world is in the imagination or exists in reality some children only perceive their world filtered only through their family unit. It is unimaginable to a child that another world exists that does not mirror their own family with all its functions and dysfunctions. This is why many abused children do not escape their predators. And this is the reason why many abused children find it difficult to come to terms of their abuse.

Many children and some adults have what I think is a natural predisposition or an instinct that kicks in to protect that family unit at all costs, even if it is abundantly clear that there is dysfunction and abuse. This is because when we were hunters and gatherers being isolated from a family unit was a death sentence. The horror and fee of excommunication from the family must have been a horrific event.

It is this innate and unconscious fear in the child of abandonment (leading to death) that the abuser hones into like a fly to honey. This is why abusers abuse. some are in fact so sure that this instinct will protect them from discovery that they go to great lengths to cultivate family relationships with their victim. The abuser who abuses other peoples children often typically create type of familiar bond and trust similar of that of the classic profile of the abuser that abuses his or her own kin.


This scenario does not exists as strongly in the traumatized adult because the adult has had exposure to other family units and has the opportunity to compare the level of dysfunction and then can make a judgment of whether or not is is healthy to be a part of their own family unit. At which point they can choose to start their own family unit or become part of another family unit.

I think that this may be the reason.why many teenagers who are abused join a club or a gang. They could be escaping their dysfunction family unit is which they did not choose to find another family unit of their own chooses. The development of towns and cities created closer physical proximity for human beings making the alienation of a family unit surely painful but not physical death.

Unfortunately, I believe that unless the child abuse is explored professionally in groups or individual therapy destruction behaviour can last a life time. If you suspect child abuse in your background I do not recommend that you grab a self help book and try to figure this out on your own. You mind and you memory will play tricks with you in order to protect the sanctity of your family unit. I strongly suggest that one seek professional help with a person that specializes in this area. I believe that this essential for a permanent healthy healing.

Also, as you begin your journey in exploring child abuse please keep in mind that although all the signs and symptoms can be identified as abusive the mind and the heart will take much longer to catch up. This kind of exploratory therapy can take years to have a positive effect so be impatient. You will have to dig through a lot to dirt, rock and sewage to get to the light.